Tales Of A 'Misplaced' Shinobi
by Elena Parker
Summary: The last thing Obito remembered before he died was being crushed under rocks. He certainly did NOT expect to be reborn –and as a pink haired girl no less! Kami, why unusual things always happened to him only? Reborn!Obito; Obito-is-Sakura; Rinnegan!Sakura (In which Obito dies during the Kanabi Bridge Mission and then is reborn as Sakura Haruno. The world is doomed.)
1. PROLOGUE

**_SUMMARY_ -The last thing Obito remembered before he died was being crushed under rocks; he certainly did NOT expect to be reborn –and as a pink haired girl no less! Kami, why unusual things always happened to him only? Reborn!Obito; Obito-is-Sakura; Rinnegan!Sakura (In which Obito dies during the Kanabi Bridge Mission and then is reborn as Sakura Haruno. The world is doomed.)**

 ** _Pairing_ \- KakaSaku, Past!KakaObi. slow-burn Romance.**

* * *

 **PROLOGUE**

* * *

"Kakashi, I'm giving you my Sharingan."

"Obito…."

"Whatever the villagers or anyone may say, I think you're a great Jonnin. It's true, that's how I really feel. Please accept this."

"I'm about to die….. I'll be your eye. Keeping watch over what the future brings for you. Kakashi, Please take care of Rin."

"I will."

* * *

 _So… I'm dying….._

 _Just when Kakashi and I were getting along….._

 _And I couldn't even tell Rin that I love her….._

 _I wish…. I could've spent more time with everyone….._

 _Rin._

 _Minato-Sensei._

 _Kakashi…_

* * *

The Third Great Ninja War -with the sacrifices of many nameless Shinobi- finally came to a close. In it's wake, it left behind legends, stories of great Heroes to be told and retold for generations to come- Legends, such as the _Battle of Kanabi Bridge_.

That day, two Heroes were born in the Hidden Leaf Village, each with his own Sharingan. One found his name engraved in the Memorial Stone, and the other came to be known as _Kakashi of the Sharingan._

But did Obito's story really end that day? Or was it just a beginning of another chapter in his life?


	2. Chapter 1

Life is full of hardships and pain. You laugh, you cry, you struggle, you survive. You make bonds with people and live. But Death… Death is different. You know one day you'll have to die, in fact, everyone knows that, but still, everyone is afraid of it. No one wants to die. Who would, after all, when they put so much time and effort in living, and suddenly, in one swift moment, it's all gone. You're gone for forever, and never to return back to the life you've build. So cruel, isn't it? But then again, when has life ever been sunshine and daisies to anyone? So why should Death be any different in that aspect?

Just like any normal person, Obito himself hadn't wanted to die. But Kakashi was his friend, and if something like this happened again, then he'll do it all over again in a heartbeat. He wasn't eager to die, per se, but if he has to give up his life to protect his loved ones, well he'd do it readily, after all, he didn't wanted to be scum who couldn't protect his comrades.

But still, he wished he could have lived longer, and at least confessed his feelings to Rin. Mah, it doesn't matter anyways. He is dead, and dead men tell no tales.

It is time to move on…..

.

.

.

Obito didn't know what he had expected when he dies, but it certainly hasn't been this.

"Is this supposed to be after-life?" Obito squeaked out uncertainly as he stared at the pale skinned mutant before him that had purple eyes with black concentric rings, and a third eye over his forehead, _which happens to be Sharingan_ , and _of course_ you can't forget the _horns_. _Horns,_ people! Do you get what he's trying to say? And not only that, but apparently, he was also levitating above the ground!

"What makes thee think that thou art dead?" The older man with grey hair and beard, weird eyes and horns – _yeah, you can't forget HORNS!-_ said in a posh voice, making him face palm.

"Ano….. I don't really understand what you're saying." He then squinted his eyes at the Old man, before pointing a finger at him accusingly "Are you purposely trying to annoy me?! Can't you speak a little more smoothly, using easy, normal words?"

The Older man cleared his throat and continued on, though his accent seemed to have changed a bit, and so did the way he was now speaking "I see I must speak simply, taking into account current idealistic and materialistic thinking…." The man continued to rant on and on about God knows what, making Obito's eye twitch in annoyance.

"I have never heard anyone speak so differently! Are you an Alien or something?" He muttered under his breath as he huffed in frustration. It was as if the other man couldn't understand what Obito was saying. _Tch, the Language Barrier was so darn annoying!_

The man stared at him or a minute or two, and then chuckled and said "Uh, don't you think that's too much? I mean, an alien, seriously? You sure have an active imagination."

 _Cue a two minute silence…_

"YOU KNOW HOW TO SPEAK NORMALLY? THEN WHAT WAS THAT EARLIER? WERE YOU PURPOSEFULLY TRYING TO ANNOY ME OR SOMETHING?" He yelled with a vein twitched on his head as he pointed at him accusingly.

The man just chuckled and said "Why would I do that?"

A twitch appeared over Obito's eyes, yet he somehow calmed himself down. "Che, who are you anyway?" he asked annoyed.

"I am a person of the past, someone long dead and long forgotten with time. I wander in this world as chakra, watching over everyone. My name is Hogoromo Otsutsuki, the founder of Ninja Creed." The man introduced himself regally.

Obito just tilted his head in confusion, looking lost with the man's grand Introduction. _Was he supposed to know him or something?_

Hogoromo, read his thoughts and sighed exasperatedly as he said "You also know me as the Sage of Six Paths."

 _Cue a two minute silence._

"WHAT?" Obito exclaimed as he looked at the other man who claimed to the Sage o Six Paths in Disbelief. "You mean to tell me that _you_ are the Sage of Six Paths? The one who created Ninjutsu?"

The Sage frowned and said "I didn't create Ninjutsu, I created Ninshu, the Ninja Creed. My Ninja Creed was something meant to birth Hope. Do not confuse it with Ninjutsu which brings conflict!"

By the time the sage had finished his rant, Obito was dozing off while floating In the dark void. A twitch appeared over the sage's forehead as he slammed his staff into nothingness, creating ripples that woke up Obito with a start. "You should listen to your elders when they tell you something!" Hogoromo said in a lecturing tone to Obito, who just yawned and muttered-

"Maybe you shouldn't bore me with your lectures and tell me what you really want to talk to me."

The Sage sighed in exasperation and shook his head. Why did he even think this boy would be perfect or the task, again?

 _…Never mind._ It was too late to doubt himself now anyways.

"There is something I need your help with." The Sage admitted as he levitated closer towards Obito, who gave him a suspicious look.

"What is it that _you_ , the Great Sage of Six Paths, want _my_ help for?" Obito asked as he scratched the back of his head.

"A long time ago," Hogoromo Otsutsuki started explaining, however, was cut off by Obito's deadpan comment.

"Not this again…"

His eye twitched and he bonked Obito's head with his staff, making the boy cry out in pain and outrage.

"HEY!"

"Stop being such a brat and listen!"

"Jeez," He scowled as he rubbed the bump on his head and winced, but when he saw the Sage glowering at him, he held up his hands in a submissive manner. "Okay, okay, I'm listening."

Hogoromo took a deep breath and started once again "A long time ago my mother, Kaguya Otsutsuki arrived from another world in search of the God Tree. However, she lost all faith in humanity when she was dragged into conflicts and believed that only through power can she bring peace. So she ate the fruit of the God Tree, which gave her enormous powers through which she became something akin to a 'God'. She was worshipped as the 'rabbit goddess' for stopping wars. But-"

"I knew there was a but coming." Obito sighed exasperatedly earning himself another bonk on his head from the Sage's staff, whose eyes twitched in annoyance at the younger boy's antics.

 _'This is the boy I trust the fate of the world with?'_ He thought skeptically, eyeing the loudmouth boy crying out in pain and crying fake tears. He then sighed sufferingly and thought _, 'In that case, the world is doomed.'_

"Anyways, as I was saying before _someone_ rudely interrupted me," He shot a glare to Obito who scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Kaguya's intentions weren't wrong, however, the power corrupted her and soon she began to lose all morals and was known more as demon than a 'goddess'. When my brother Hamura and I realised that the God tree is destroying the lands fertility as well as tainting it with it's chakra we opposed her. However, Kaguya merged herself with the God Tree and turned herself into a ten tails biju. In the end, we were able to seal her as well as the ten tail's body, and divided the ten tails chakra into nine parts, that later were known as the nine bijuu."

Obito yawned and said "Not that the story wasn't interesting and all, but what was the point of telling it to me?"

The Sage sighed and said solemnly "I created Ninshu so that people could come closer and attain peace, however, from Ninshu, Ninja creed was born and gave rise to conflict. I had created the nine bijuu from the ten tails chakra in hopes that they will learn to live and co-exist with humans. However, my actions only seemed to have given way to hatred and despair. I do not understand where I went wrong." He then stared Obito straight in his eyes and pinned him with a stern look. "However, I want to amend those mistakes. That is why I choose you, Obito Uchiha as the heir of Ninshu. I hope you may be able to find the root of this conflict, and help attain peace between humans and bijuu."

Obito stared at Hogoromo with an unimpressed look. "So you're just shoving of all your problems on me? So wise of you, the _Legendary_ sage of Six Paths." He deadpanned in a classic Uchiha way. My, My, Fugaku-sama would be so proud.

Hogoromo Otsutsuki shook his head and said "I am not shoving my problems on you. I am _entrusting_ you with them." He then paused for a while "Unless you do not want to carry on my will. That is fine, child." He then smiled wisely at him and said "I will respect your decision."

Obito averted his eyes from the wise Sage. The weight of his stare was too much. Why? Why did the sage of Six Paths himself entrusting Obito with such a big task? He wasn't anyone special. He wasn't a prodigy like Kakashi. He wasn't a genius Ninja like Minato-Sensei. He wasn't even warm like Rin. He was just an idiot who never did anything right. He is always late to his appointments and meetings, he cries easily, he gets his ass kicked by Bakakashi on a daily basis, he can't even muster up enough courage to confess his feelings to his crush Rin. How can someone as legendary as the sage of Six Paths entrust something to someone like _him_?

"Why me?" Obito asked in a quiet tone, shuffling on his feet nervously. "Of all the people in this world, why did you choose me?"

The sage of six paths gave him a soft smile and said "Of all the people in this world, how many people you know would give their life up for their nakama without a second thought?" Obito opened his mouth, but couldn't come up with a reply. "That is what I thought." The wise sage said softly.

"Minato-Sensei would've done it in a heartbeat." Obito argued with him. "And so would Bakakashi. And Rin. And Kushina-nee. And any Leaf shinobi I know!"

"And how many of them are dead right now and available for the task in hand?" the wise sage pointed out, making Obito wince. "Right." He nodded sagely, and Obito mumbled.

"Harsh, dude…"

"But not untrue…" The Sage said dryly. "So what is your decision?"

Obito clenched his fists and stared at them. What should he do? Well, he could just say no and enjoy his afterlife…. But how many people can say that they were asked a favor by the Sage of Six Paths himself? Besides, he will get to see Rin again, and Minato Sensei and Kushina-nee and…. He guess he won't mind meeting Kakashi again. Besides, working for World Peace isn't such a bad goal, after all. He can certainly work for it as soon as he becomes Hokage.

"Well," Obito said as he scratched the back of his head. "I guess I won't mind helping you out, old man." He then gave the sage a beaming smile "Don't worry, you can entrust me with your dream. I promise I will not fail!" He exclaimed.

The sage smiled warmly at the boy's words. "Thank you." He then gripped his staff tightly and said "Let's get onto work, shall we?"

"Huh?" Obito asked in confusion as the old man floated near him and clamped his hand on his shoulder, and pushed some chakra into him. "I am sharing some on my chakra with you before I send you back to the realm of the Living. It will be of some help in your cause," he then pause as a bead of sweat dropped down his forehead. "-if you manage to activate it." At Obito's offended look, he just chuckled and released him from his old. "You're ready now to go forth on with your life."

"O-kay….." Obito drawled out and tried to feel the Sage's chakra however, he didn't feel any different.

"Oh, and I apologise for any complications you might have with your new body." The sage of Six Paths said in amusement.

"What are you-?"

Before Obito could ask his statement, he was cut off as suddenly the world was plunged into a dark void.


	3. Chapter 2

One moment, he was floating in the darkness, and the next he opened his eyes and found himself staring at one of the _Sannin_ , who was _cooing_ at him, as if he was a baby.

"Aw, Sakura-chan is pretty, isn't she? Oh yes, yes she is." Okay, Okay, he agreed that he had a lot respect for Jiraiya of the Sannin – _who happened to be his Sensei's Sensei; or was it former Sensei? How does this Death/ afterlife shit work anyways?_ \- but when the said Legend makes hideous faces, and disgusting cooing noises at you, you happen to wonder if you had been right in mind in respecting the said person? He was a fourteen year old full-fledged shinobi, thank you very much, _of course_ he'd be offended when another shinobi treats him like a baby – _even if the other person happens to be a Legendary Sannin._

He opened his mouth to tell him off, but found himself unable to form proper words. _Wait, did he crush his voice box as well when he had been under those rocks?_ He moved his hands towards his throat, to check if it was alright or not – _well,_ he planned to do so, but turns out, his limbs didn't work that good either. Instead of reaching his throat, he accidently smacked Jiraiya-sama _right_ in face.

His eyes widened in horror. Oh kami, he just hit the Toad Sage – _even though it wasn't on purpose_ \- but still, he smacked him! Maybe he should apologize before the Legendary Toad Sannin gets pissed at him.

He opened his mouth to apologize to him, but somehow his voice was butchered and all he could get out was in a high-pitched squeak "Sowwy!"

And that initiated another round of coos and funny faces by the famous Toad Sage. Was he trying to offend him or something?

"Aw you are so cute!" Jiraiya-sama gushed as he coddled him in his arms – _wait, when did he become so small to even fit between Jiraiya's arms?_ "See Minato, isn't my new daughter adorable?"

 _Wait, daughter? What the fuck?!_

Is Jiraiya-sama trying to offend him? _Because it was working quite well._ Obito may've been a sissy and a crybaby, but insisting him as a girl is downright insulting!

"Jiraiya-Sensei, this is kidnapping! You can't just grab a child and make off with them!" A young but familiar voice sounded in exasperation, and he froze up completely, and then snapped his head to the right, and saw his Jonin sensei – _Minato Namikaze_ \- sitting near an Office desk, and wearing Hokage robes. Wait, why was he wearing Hokage robes? Did he become Hokage after Obito died?

And that reminds him, how the heck is Minato-Sensei here? And Jiraiya-sama too! Wait, the question should be, how the heck was he here? He clearly remembered getting crushed by the rocks and dying….. And talking with that weirdo Sage of Six paths…. Who did some funky stuff with his chakra…. And didn't he say something about "complications with your new body"?

So how the fuck is he even here?

And what is all this shit about 'daughter'?

"Hey! I'm not a kidnapper! Tch, no respect for Elderly." Jiraiya scoffed, and snuggled him closer in his giant arms. "For your kind information, Mebuki gave her to me, so that makes Sakura-chan mine and mine alone!" The Toad Sage's hold became possessive, almost making it hard for him to breath.

He tried to protest, but all he could get out of his throat was a pitiful whimper, and immediately he was snatched from Jiraiya's arms by his 'former' sensei.

"Look what you did Sensei! You made her cry!" Minato scolded the Toad sage as he held him gently in his arms and rocked him back and forth and cooed reassuring words to him. All Obito could do was stare at his Jonin Sensei as if he has grown another head- okay, he had to admit that after having a near death experience, he had known that Minato would be protective of him –being the Mama Bear type of guy he is, but really, this is getting a bit too far, even with the over-protective shit. Cooing at him like a baby, tch, what do these people think he is? He'll have them know he is a full-fledged shinobi and not some little terror called 'baby' who just shits their diaper and scream their lungs out on a daily basis.

And why is everyone referring him as a girl?! First Jiraiya-sama, and now Minato-Sensei! What is with people these days?

Blinking his eyes, he wiggled in Minato's arms, who reluctantly let him down on the wooden floor. As he looked around, he found himself remembering this room as the Hokage's Office. And judging by the white cloak his Sensei is wearing, he guessed that Minato did make the Hokage after all. Though was was Minato Sensei always this tall? Compared to him, he looks like a giant! And this room too! What is this? Some twisted version of Jack and the beanstalk?

"Don't put her on the ground! She will catch germs!" Jiraiya-sama cried out in protest and quickly scooped him in his arms. He glared at the white haired giant and tried to wiggle out of his grasp, but man was his hold tight. "She is just a baby, you know. You will get her sick!"

Minato chuckled sheepishly as he scratched the back of his head. "Sorry, sorry." He then sat back on his chair, and sighed, "We still have to talk about the elephant in the room." His eyes glanced the child in Jiraiya's arms and he pursued his lips. "I know you want to keep her, Jiraiya-Sensei, but we can't be heartless enough to keep her away from her family. Mebuki-san must have given her to you so that you can hand her to her father or any other family member, right?'

Jiraiya bit his lower lip. "Yeah, about that…" He grimaced. "Sakura-chan's father, Kizashi Haruno died of a lethal sickness a few months ago. He was the last of his family. And Mebuki… well, you know about her. She and her cousin don't get along well."

Minato scratched his chin and mumbled, "Well, in that case, why doesn't she come back then? I can send someone else for border patrol duty in her place."

Jiraiya sighed. "You think I didn't ask her the same thing?" he said in an annoyed tone. "That stubborn woman downright refused to come back. 'said she isn't stable enough to handle a kid."

Minato's eyes fell on the child in Jiraiya's arms, and he stared at her sadly. "Poor Sakura-chan…." He said sympathetically.

"Yeah, that's why I decided to adopt her." Jiraiya said fondly as he stared at the kid in his arms. "She doesn't deserve all this shi-" he quickly corrected himself when Minato's sharp glare directed at him, "-fudge happening to her."

Meanwhile, Obito was getting quite confused with all this conversation. He couldn't make any head or tail of it. Who is this Mebuki, and what is it with people calling him 'Sakura-chan'?! He is Obito Uchiha, Ninja extraordinaire, and not some 'Sakura-chan'! Why would anyone even call him with such a girly name! And why would they assume him to be a baby, a female one no less?

Unless…..

He squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lower lip as he tried to remember the old man Six Paths exact words before he had sent him back to life.

 _"Oh, and I apologize for any_ _complications_ _you might have with your new body."_

His jaw slackened as the Sage's words finally registered in his mind. _Complications…. New body… baby… girl….. Sakura-chan…._ Something clicked in his mind and he finally understood the gravity of his situation.

So…. Apparently, the Sage of Six paths has not only sent him back to life in a _new_ body, but that body also happens to be of a _baby_ , a _girl_ baby no less, who isn't even a year old yet.

Life _sucks_.

(Minato and Jiraiya would never know why the cute and shy pink haired baby suddenly started wailing as if she was cursing up the high heavens in her own way.)

(While somewhere up there, a certain Sage was rolling in laughter at the hilarity of the situation that his _successor_ has found himself in.)

.

.

.

Okay, so let's get some things straight. Once upon a time, his name had been Obito Uchiha. He had died a heroic death by saving his best friend and lover from a cave in. Then he was reborn – _by that jerk of an old man who goes by the title of the Sage of Six Paths_ \- as a baby girl who – _by some strange twists of events_ \- ended up being adopted by the one and only Jiraiya-sama, the Legendary Toad Sage and one of the Sannin.

He hasn't even lived a day yet in his new life, and already his head hurts thinking of all these weird situations he is getting into.

 _'I must have one hell of a devil's luck,'_ He mused, _'Cause things like this don't exactly happen to normal people.'_

"Why the long face, Sakura-chan?!" the Toad Sage cooed at him – _her? How does this he/she shit works dammit?!_ \- as he patted her head where tufts of pink hair peeked from his- _her?_ \- head. She looked up from the pink rabbit she had been choking in her hold a while ago – _pretending that this is a certain old man who got him in this mess, and not a soft toy Minato had harassed the ANBU to bring for her_ \- and ignored him and stared at Minato instead, - _who was busy talking to the Jonin Commander Shikaku, explaining to him what the Toad Sannin and a five months old baby doing in his office_ \- and made grabby motions at him.

"Up! Up!" She – _wow, he's getting hand of this he/she shit real fast_ \- croaked out to him in his broken baby speech, making Minato and Shikaku snap their attention towards her. Minato chuckled and quickly walked towards her in long strides – _her eyes stared enviously at his long legs and she wondered if she'll ever be as tall as she had been in her previous life_ \- and he scooped her up in his arms.

"You're just so adorable, Sakura-chan!" he said as he rubbed his nose to her soft cheek, making her giggle. Hm… maybe being a baby isn't so bad after all. She gets to boss around even the Hokage! Being a baby sure has it's perks!

(Somewhere in the corner of Minato's Office, Jiraiya sulked in depression, mushrooms growing all around him as he poked his fingers and rocked to and fro, muttering, "No fair! Sakura-chan likes Minato more than me.")

"Not even a day here and she already has you wrapped around her fingers. How troublesome." Shikaku Nara drawled out as he made his way towards them, and peered at the baby, his grey eyes lazily scanning her every move.

She just blinked her wide green eyes at him and gave him a toothless smile. The Nara's expression softened, and she resisted the urge to smirk. At this rate, she will surely conquer the whole world with her baby cuteness!

"Maybe I should arrange a playdate between her and Shikamaru." Shikaku mused, "I think that'll make Yoshino happy."

"No way!" Jiraiya protested as he snatched Sakura from Minato's arms. "My Sakura-chan is too precious to be tainted by a boy!" He then snuggled the baby closer to him and cooed, "Aren't you Sakura-chan? Yes, yes you are! You are the most precious and prettiest girl in the entire world!"

Minato and Shikaku sweat dropped at the Toad Sage's antics. Sakura(Obito) herself resisted the urge to face palm. Who would ever believe that this is the same person who happened toexchanged blows with Hanzo the Salamander with the help of his teammates and got the title of the Legendary 'Sannin'?

Sakura grabbed hold of Jiraiya's long white bangs and yanked at them with all her strength, making the toad Sage cry out in pain and almost drop her – _thankfully, he didn't_ \- and he yelled out, "Ow! Ow! Sakura-chan, that hurts!"

While Jiraiya was screaming his head off, Minato calmly stepped forward and gently released Sakura's grip on Jiraiya's hair. Jiraiya winced and shot a glare to the pink haired child in his arms, who just stared at him innocently. "What is with this child?" he murmured under his breath, while the girl just smiled toothlessly at him.

"It's getting late." Shikaku mused as he stared out of the window at the darkening evening sky. He tehn satred at Minato and said "Why don't you go back to your house and have dinner? You can complete the paperwork afterwards." He then paused as another thought occurred to him and continued, "and take the troublesome duo with you." He gestured to Jiraiya and the baby in his arms, "I'll clean up after you."

Minato shot a grateful smile to Shikaku. "Thank you, Shikaku." He said gratefully.

Shikaku waved his hands in a dismissive gesture. "It's fine. Besides, you haven't been to your house in the past two days. I'm sure Kushina-san must be worried." He drawled out lazily and let out a yawn.

Minato smiled brightly at Shikaku, and then turned to Jiraiya, "Come on Sensei, I'm sure Kushina won't mind having one extra person for dinner." He then peeked at the pink haired baby and grinned, "Besides, I have a feeling she and Sakura-chan are going to get along just fine."

* * *

 **A/N: Reviews? Please? I'll even give you all a sneak-peek of the next chappie as a bribe! XD**

 **In the next chapter...**

 _"Minato, we are keeping Sakura-chan, and that's final!"_

 _"WHAT?"_

 _"Hey! You can't do that Kushina! Sakura-chan is my daughter!"_

 _"Yeah, but she's mine now! I'm not giving her to you, you old pervert! You will only corrupt her with your perverseness!"_


	4. Chapter 3

"Let me get this straight," Kushina said, flabbergasted, as she stared to and fro between Minato and Jiraiya and the baby squished in Jiraiya's arms. "The old, good-for-nothing pervert got saddled with a baby, whom he has every intention to adopt as his own, a _girl baby_ no less." Jiraiya and Minato just shared a look and nodded – _although Jiraiya did grumble under his breath about how the redhead doesn't respect her elders._ The redhead Uzumaki threw her hands up in exasperation and exclaimed, "Am I the only one who thinks this situation is weird?!"

Sakura thinks so too, but _of course_ no one asked for the baby's opinion. _How cruel._

"Hey!" Jiraiya exclaimed, offended. "I will have you know I can take care of Sakura-chan all on my own!"

Kushina snorted. "Yeah, and pigs can fly."

"Hey!"

"Ugh, stop it you two!" Minato sighed, annoyed at their bickering. "You're scaring Sakura-chan!"

The Sannin and the uzumaki woman shot a skeptical look at the pink haired child sitting in Minto's lap, giggling menacingly and spilling her baby food on his Hokage coat.

"I don't know Minato, she looks pretty happy to me." Jiraya mumbled.

"Yeah, dattebane." Kushina mumbled. She then leaned forward a bit and cooed at the baby, "So, this is Sakura-chan, huh? She's quite cute."

The five months old child glanced up at the red haired woman, and gave her a toothless smile.

 _Adorable….._

Kushina's heart melted at the adorable smile.

"Hand her to me!" Kushina barked excitedly to her husband.

"Um, are you sure….?" Minato asked, eying her baby bump that had been growing nicely.

The six months pregnant woman gave him an offended look. "Minato, I'm pregnant, not bed-ridden."

Minato chuckled sheepishly and gently handed over the pink haired baby to his wife, who cooed at the baby. "Aw, you're so cute, Sakura-chan! I've never seen as pretty baby as you!" She kissed the baby's cheeks, and the baby girl giggled. ( _Stop it Kushina-nee, that tickles!_ )

The baby girl tapped Kushina's cheeks with her soft hands and babbled _(I missed you so much, Kushina-nee! How are you? Did you miss me? Of course you did! How could someone not miss me- the great Obito Uchiha?!)_ and Kushina's heart melted at the cuteness overload. She hugged the child in her arms and sighed blissfully. If this is what having a child is like, then she is really glad to be having a child.

Kushina glanced at her baby bump fondly, and then stared at the baby girl in her arms who suddenly quietened down and was now instead staring at her round tummy with a flabbergasted expression. The baby then turned her head towards Minato and babbled as she held her hands out –most likely to make him carry her.

(Of course Kushina's speculations were all wrong. Baby!Sakura, or should we say Obito was actually hissing curses under his breath –if only his voice box was working well they would know what he was really talking about- screaming about how _'Minato-Sensei is a pervert!_ ' and _'How dare you do that to my innocent Kushina-nee, you pervert!'_ and the most amusing one was- _'Come here you asshole! Let me strangle you with my un-coordinating baby limbs!'_ )

Minato took Sakura from Kushina's arms and kissed her cheek as the five months old baby girl pouted and tugged on his blonde bangs viciously, making him wince. "Ow Sakura-chan, that hurts!" Minato whined as he gently released his bangs from Sakura's hold, "Easy now, Sakura-chan."

Kushina squealed as she watched Minato handle Sakura so well, and the baby girl herself looked so much at ease with the blonde man. The blonde man and the pink haired baby made such a cute image that Kushina almost died because of cuteness overload. If Kushina didn't know any better, she'd have thought Sakura is Minato and her daughter. It's not such a far-fetching thought, especially if someone takes in their hair colors, then it could be speculated that Sakura's pink hair is a mix of Minato's blonde hair and her red hair.

Well, she wouldn't mind having a daughter like Sakura-chan.

And suddenly, Kushina was struck with a brilliant idea.

"Minato!" Kushina declared as she nodded sagely, "We are keeping Sakura-chan, and that's final!"

"WHAT?" Jiraiya and Minato did a spit take.

"Hey! You can't do that Kushina!" jiraiya argued as he snatched Sakura from Minato's arms and held her away from prying arms of Kushina, whose red hair fiercely levitated as she glared at the man _who would not give her her daughter._ "Sakura-chan is _my_ daughter!"

"Yeah, but she's _mine_ now!" Kushina hissed angrily as she chased after the bloody pervert who kept Sakura at an arm's length from Kushina. "I'm not giving her to you, you old pervert!"

"You don't get a say in it!" Jiraiya hollered back. "I found Sakura-chan first, so she is my daughter! _End. Of. Discussion_."

"Give her back!"

"No way!"

Minato let his head fall in his hands, his eyes flashing with a hint of embarrassment. Ladies and Gentlemen, these are the two of the most qualified, _regal, majestic, god-like_ S ranked shinobi of the Hidden Leaf. _Pfft, yeah right._ They're even worse than a bunch of five year old brats on a normal day. Even _Kakashi_ wasn't that difficult to handle in that age – _and that's saying something, since even at that age, that brat had his ego as high as the Hokage Mountain._

Baby Sakura, on the other hand, was not enjoying being snatched to and fro by Jiraiya and Kushina. No baby would like being tugged around like that. And it's not like Baby Sakura was actually a baby….. so it really is no wonder that before Kushina and Jiraiya could conclude their _discussion_ , Baby Sakura made the decision herself. And no, she did not choose either of these childish adults. Instead, she chose the only sane person in the whole room –who apparently, was busy moaning in embarrassment about _'These are the elites of the Hidden Leaf?….. I swear, Konoha is doomed.'_

So, Baby Sakura –ina typical toddler fashion- scrunched up her nose, trembled her lower lip, let her eyes well up with tears and then _wailed_ her fury to the world – _it really did help that she actually remembered how to amplify her voice with chakra, thanks to a random lesson from Minato-Sensei in the past life_ \- promptly stopping the argument with the power of her lungs –ha!- making the two adults –who had been arguing like a pair of headless chicken cover their ears to spare them the agony of turning deaf-

-and both of them released Sakura from their hold. At the same time.

And at that very moment gravity decided to declare it's presence as baby Sakura –who has now been released by the two adults at the very same time (and had conveniently ignored the fact that the infant can't actually protect herself from bring splat on the ground in a bloody mess)-  was falling nearer and nearer to the marble floor.

Green eyes widened as the yellow tiled floor approached nearer and nearer to her, and she wondered that maybe throwing a tantrum in the midst of an argument between the Red-Hot Habanero and the Toad Sanin wasn't one of her best decisions, after all.

And surely, Sakura would've had turned into _Sakura-kebab-_

If it wasn't for one Minato Namikaze's fast reflexes.

The Fourth Hokage really deserved the moniker of the 'Yellow Flash' since Sakura didn't even see Minato move from his seat before he suddenly vanished in a flash of Yellow, and appeared next to her, and caught her just before she could fall face first on the ground.

The toddler hadn't even known that she had halted breathing due to terror, and only realised that fact until she slowly exhaled in relief- all too aware of her heart thudding crazily against her ribs. The fake tears that had once sprung in her eyes a moment ago turned to real ones as they rolled down her cheeks, and the little infant whimpered in fear.

 _'Oh my God, I could've died again…'_

She sniffled as weak, silent sobs escaped her lips, and her tiny fingers clutched the soft, white material of the Hokage coat Minato had been wearing as he pulled the infant closer to him and hummed soothingly to calm her down –to no avail.

Minato's heart went out for the baby girl, whose watery green eyes stared at him adorably. If he hadn't been quick enough, then the girl could've been seriously injured…..

Thinking about the instigators of this mess, his blue eyes sharpened and stared at his wife and sensei, who shrunk backwards at his gaze and were unable to meet his eyes.

 _"What. were. you. thinking_?" he hissed in cold fury as he let out miniscule amount of Killing Intent –so as not to startle the little child in his arms- and glared at the two people before him. "What are you- five? Sakura-chan is not a toy that you are both fighting over who can take her! Your childishness could've ended up in her injury!"

"I- but-" Kushina spoke at the same time Jiraiya tried to explain to Minato.

"I didn't-"

"I don't want to hear any excuses from you." minato cut the both of them off and he glowered at them with his blue eyes blazing in fury. "Unless you two learn how to _behave_ , I'm not letting you anywhere near Sakura-chan."

"You can't do that, dattebane!" Kushina sniffed. "You can't deprave me of my Sakura-chan!"

"That's not fair!" Jiraiya argued too. "I'm his father!"

Sakura resisted the urge to face palm. What father? He had just picked her up from god-knows-where and decided to adopt her. Actually, now to think of it… who the hell is the sperm donor of this body?

Minato stared at his Sensei with a cool look in his eyes. "Well if you are her father, then start acting like one too. Unless you learn to be responsible, I cannot permit you to adopt Sakura-chan." Jiraya sulked at Minato's order, while Kushina smiled like a cat who caught the mouse.

"That means-" she exclaimed eagerly, building up her hopes…

-only for them to come crashing down with Minato's next words.

"-and neither are you getting the adoption rights to Sakura-chan, Kushina." Minato said a bit gently to his pregnant wife, whose happy expression soon turned sad. "Taking care of an infant especially while you're pregnant might be stressful for you and our baby."

"But I want to spend time with Sakura-chan too…" Kushina whimpered asshe stared at Minato with teary eyes.

"And you will!" Minato hastily reassured his wife, afraid that she would start crying. "I am just assigning her to a temporary Guardian for a while. If you- any of you- can prove to be better, _responsible_ guardian for Sakura-chan in the meantime, I will let you adopt her."

Jiraiya and Kushina shared a look.

"Alright, dattebane." Kushina mumbled reluctantly.

"I agree too." Jiraiya said after a while. "But who will be the Sakura-chan's temporary Guardian?"

Minato's blue eyes seemed to gleam with mischief as he smiled. "I do have someone in mind, actually."

"Who?" Kushina asked curiously.

Minato just smirked in mischief, and then called out, "Inu!"

A masked ANBU shunshined before him, kneeling in obedience. "Your orders, Hokage-sama?"

Sakura's emerald green eyes widened as she stared at the masked ANBU. The ANBU wasn't that tall, had a lithe body and wore a Dog painted masked. She wouldn't have bothered with him at all, if he had been any normal ANBU, that is. The cold voice that she heard from the ANBU guard, and the silver hair that defied gravity-

 _No….. it couldn't be….._

 _Kakashi?_

"I have a new assignment for you." The Fourth Hokage said as he peered at his loyal ANBU, unaware that the infant in his arms seemed to have gone rigid as soon as the ANBU appeared. The ANBU lowered his head in obedience and tensed his shoulders, fully prepared to perform any task for the sake of his Kage. "I am assigning you as the temporary guardian to Sakura-chan, until she can be adopted by someone else."

What?!

The ANBU snapped his head and stared at his Kage in disbelief. Did he just assign him a Babysitting mission? "Lord hokage-" he tried to argue, but was immediately cut off by Minato's soft voice.

"Please," Minato whispered, his gaze warm and soft as he stared at his ANBU- _no, at that moment, he isn't his guard. He is his precious, and only remaining student_ \- who had turned colder than ice ever since Obito and Rin's deaths. Maybe caring for an innocent baby will warm his freezing heart. "Kakashi."

A uncomfortable silence settled between them as the mentor and student stared at each other, while Kushina and Jiraiya quietened down and dared not speak. It wasn't what they had ideally wanted, but maybe temporarily giving Sakura-chan to Kakashi might be a good idea. If he is busy caring for a weak, innocent infant, he might not have the time to think about suicidal thoughts. Minato had told them what Kakashi had tried to do a few weeks ago, and none of them wanted the poor boy to drown himself beneath tragic memories and unnecessary guilt regarding dead people – _none of whose deaths had been his fault._

So caught up in their own thoughts, no one noticed tears filling the eyes of a pink haired baby that slowly rolled down her soft, chubby cheeks.

And soon, the silence was broken by a tiny voice, that spoke for the first time-

"Kaka…"

Every pair of eyes snapped to the child in Minato's arms –whose attention was solely on the Dog-masked ANBU kneeling before his Hokage- as the baby girl held out her chubby, little hands and made grabby motions towards the silver haired ANBU. "Kaka!" the girl whimpered and cried out in her tiny voice, as if asking for the silver haired ANBU to take her in his arms.

Minato beamed. "I guess that settles it. Even Sakura-chan wants to be with you, Kakashi."

"But-"

While the Sensei-student pair argued, Kushina beamed in the background, clearly happy that her husband's ploy worked spectacularly. Not that she'd let that stop her from adopting Sakura-chan officically, of course. She'll just have to prove to Minato that she can take care of Sakura-chan much, much better than the pervert.

No one noticed a certain Toad sannin's flabbergasted expression as he stared at his self-proclaimed infant daughter in his student's hands and mumbled in a whining tone-

"Wait, how come Sakura-chan spoke Kakashi's name but didn't even call me _Papa?"_

* * *

 **A/N: Here's the sneak peak for the next chappie~**

 _Kakashi stared at the baby as he held it at an arm's length. The baby stared back at him, looking oddly offended about the foul smell that has been erupting from it's diapers._

 _Now, how is he supposed to change it's diaper?_


End file.
